Anaconda

12/27/2025

I headed into this 2025 reimagining of ANACONDA - not a remake! - with a mix of cautious optimism and a heavy dose of nostalgia for the 1997 original. Having followed Tom Gormican's knack for meta-humor, I was curious to see if he could successfully transplant that self-aware energy into a creature feature. What I found was a film that thrives when it leans into its own absurdity, particularly through a movie-within-a-movie satire that mirrors the chaotic, often delusional passion of indie filmmaking. The central dynamic between Paul Rudd and Jack Black is the undeniable heartbeat of the experience; their natural chemistry makes the midlife-crisis subtext feel surprisingly grounded amidst the jungle mayhem. However, the true scene-stealer is Selton Mello, who delivers a hilariously eccentr

12/30/2025

Perhaps if they’d screened the first version of this story from 1997 followed by the whole of “Quatch” then I might have better appreciated this Sony reboot of the story? Then again, maybe not. Right from the start, we know that there is a giant snake at large and so when recently fired bit-part actor “Griff” (Paul Rudd) suggests to his “Quatch” co-star, wedding video director “Doug” (Jack Black) that he has acquired the rights to remake “Anaconda” - only without Eric Stolz, they leap at the opportunity and set off with pals “Claire” (Thandiwe Newton); “Kenny” (Steve Zahn) and slightly less than ten thousand bucks. Before they even manage to embark on their boat, though, they find themselves caught up in some local gold smuggling shenanigans thanks to “Ana” (Daniela Melchior) and then anot

2/19/2026

It was more fun than scary. Especially the scene at the end where the guy shows off his actions in public as an achievement was great 😂 I liked it and it's definitely worth watching. The acting is fantastic, the effects are good, and the script is entertaining. I think it deserves a 7 out of 10. Thank you for your hard work.

6/1/2026

Technically proficient, creatively dead inside This is a parody of itself, a low-effort attempt at sincerity and with great acting to gloss it all over. It is not a good movie, although technically proficient and looking lovely, the story just does not carry, despite the heroic effort of the actors involved. If you want a good Anaconda go rewatch the 90s one. Even one or two of the sequels. They were not as pretty, but they had more heart.