Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales

5/24/2017

"[An] ugly skyscraper of a film; to build it must have been a monumental undertaking (that cost Disney a reported $230million), but what, if anything of merit is the outcome...?" Read the full review here: http://screen-space.squarespace.com/reviews/2017/5/24/pirates-of-the-caribbean-dead-men-tell-no-tales.html

9/25/2017

There has never been a truly awful, **awful** entry in the _Pirates of the Caribbean_ franchise. But there's only ever been one that was truly any good. _Dead Men Tell No Tales_ does nothing to alter these assertions. I would not begrudge anybody who enjoyed their time with this latest _Pirates_ movie, particularly anyone who saw it on the big screen, there's the zany action romps that the series has been famous for from the get go (and that started wearing thin on me after the second one) and some truly spectacular visuals including shiny rocks and zombie sharks (which I will refrain from making a joke about jumping). But where _Dead Men Tell No Tales_ fails harder than anywhere else is in its dialogue. Virtually every line is uncomfortable to hear delivered, and I can't see myself loo

3/28/2022

If only we could recycle our waste as efficiently as Disney appear to be able to recycle this theme! Once again, we find "Jack Sparrow" (Johnny Depp) in a bit of bother from someone from his past. This time it is Javier Bardem ("Salazar") who has escaped from his purgatory in the "Devil's Triangle" to avenge himself on his arch-enemy. Meantime, the young "Henry Turner" (Brenton Thwaites) seeks help to track down Poseidon's Trident which will empower him to take control of the seas, and to reunite with his father - the original "Bootstrap" (Orlando Bloom). There's no doubt that this is a great looking film, the effects are spectacular but the story is little better than a regurgitation of voyages gone by. The cuties that were Bloom and Kiera Knightley have been succeeded by the handsome, bo

1/14/2023

It was a lot better than the 3rd installment, it was more memorable than the bulk of the 4th...but there are issues. The charm of the original two is missing and Jack seems worn down and not nearly as much fun as he was in past installments. He seemed to go from the lovable scoundrel that Forest Gumps his way through the 7 seas, to just, well, to just a drunkard. Lets hope in the next one we get the charm and fun back, rather than a paint by numbers installment with a less than fun Sparrow.

7/26/2023

Part 5 has Jack Sparrow now on a quest for to find the trident of poseidon. Still a lot of the original crew is missing as well. Still a good movie and lots of crazy scenes.